Epic War 2 Review

Please i made this late last night so dont flame me. Instead just tell me what I need to improve on. And next time I'll try my hand at a PC or Console game.

I think this one is better than the other review. I didnt read it but i would rate them out of 10 or just leave the conclusion at 10 not 400.

Cool, I'm gonna try it.

Still highly amateurish. The writing itself lacks articulation and thats probably due to a lack of effort. If you only took you one night to review something, then you obviously didn't do a good job.

First issue. Don't break up the review into different subsections. A piece of writing is a lot more powerful when it's one consistent, coherent work. What you have is a bunch of loose, disconnected statements of a vague nature. There are times when you can break a review into a list, but that is more of an exception that proves the rule, and even still when it happens it is usually made for comedic effect (not due to breaking the parts of the game apart like this).

Another problem is the level of subjectivity in the review, DON'T DO IT. One of the first things you learn about writing is to NOT USE "I"--it alienates you from your audience. The same goes for "you." You have to retain a level of objectivity, its a given that no matter what this is your personal opinion, but bias should be removed as thoroughly as possible. "I" can be used, again in mostly comedic situations, but you need to generally avoid the "I think" and "I like" sort of sentences.

Thirdly, your sections start abruptly. There is no real introduction. JUST BAM SYNOPSIS. String your thoughts together coherently and intellectually. Your review also suffers from a very tired and redundant "and then...and then...and then" sort of thing. Also, abolish the 400 score entirely, it's useless. The broadness is unneeded. What is the real difference between a 390 and 391? Nothing. Even between a 370 and a 390, it's hardly distinguishable. I prefer using a five-point scale for it's precise nature, but a ten-point system is just fine. A lot of people (and publications like EGM and the extinct GameNOW) use a letter grade system. Which is something we can all relate to. If you like the 100-point system that much, use letters, just keep the arbitrary percentage to yourself.

I'll be perfectly blunt, your review is pretty rubbish, has no sense of humor (which isn't always necessary, but a review like this could need it), and lacks articulate insight into the (rather esoteric) game. However, on a positive note, your current mistakes are all amateurish ones that are fixed with effort and experience. I recommend reading in general, to expand your vocabulary, but furthermore to look into this sort of journalism period. Whether it be music, video games, or movies; you can only benefit. I recommend taking a drop by 1Up.com to learn the ropes of this sort of writing. I don't know how serious you are about this stuff, but I imagine you'd have some intention of improving. Your work shows a lot about who you are, so present yourself well.


P.S. On a final note, I'd like to re-iterate (read: beg) that you SPEND MORE TIME on a review. I know when I do one it can take anywhere from 2 days to 2 weeks.

lol, pritty good Derek.

hey man dont worry I just made this one last night really quickly. Im not expecting it to be great.

Thats exactly my point, it's terrible and lazy. I can't believe this board is eating it up. I was writing like this when I was ten.